Thursday, February 15, 2007

Good Advice

I took Woelk's advice regarding appropriate professional conversations and revealed to the general populace that I, in fact, fuck bitches for money. Not only this, but I do so with reckless abandon, having no concept of my own safety or the number of bastard nerds I spawn.

I brought it up in rounds today. (Mind you, I was post-call, so words just sort of tumble out.)

"So, this is day of life 34, corrected gestational age of 38 and one out of seven who weighs 1787 grams today. He self-extubated today, so I reintubated his punk ass. Oh, and by the way, I fuck bitches for money. Can we look at the chest film?"

Attending: "You what?"

ER: "I fuck bitches for money. Now, how about that X-ray?"

Attending: "I don't believe you."

ER: "Believe it or not. I'm long, I'm strong, and I'm here to get the friction on. "

Attending: "I still don't believe you."

So I fucked his daughter and she gave me a fiver.

That is all. Back to work.

4 comments:

Fick said...

I'm going to throw that into some everyday conversation tomorrow and see how it turns out...

Since i'm not a doctor I don't think it'll have the same effect.

N.A.R.B. said...

hahaha, so does he believe you now?

Matt said...

not to be contentious but isn't the expression simply...

"fuck bitches, get money."

E-Rush said...

You're right about that, of course. I tried to work that exact verbology into the conversation, but it didn't flow. So I had to paraphrase.

I think I still got my point across.